Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Chuck Fact: Peeing the bed

A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.

I was babysitting for somebody once and spent the night over at their house because I was going to be watching the kids the whole weekend. While sleeping I had a dream that I got up went to the bathroom and all, well I woke up in the morning and realized I had actually wet the bed.
Luckily since they still had young kids they did happen to have one of these plastic protectors on the bed to keep the pee on the mattress, but they had one of those foam egg crate things that I ended up peeing on. So the whole next day I spent cleaning the sheets and spraying down the bed to keep anything from smelling like piss.
Peed my pants one other time as an adult as well.
I came back to my dorm room, my freshman year in college and was so drunk, I rationalized peeing the bed as to getting up and actually walking down the hall to the bathroom.
In my drunk head that night, it seemed like the best idea, not such a great idea the next day….

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