Bitties

I work with very eclectic group of people. And there is a group of support staff that I call "Bitties." Now my Bitties are a great source of entertainment for me. Whether they are throwing a hissy fit, talking politics or anatomy, I constantly find myself in utter amazement at the words that flow from these aged lips.
The Bitties are called the Bitties because they are somewhat of a click, like the ones I hated in high school, only instead of being in their teens they are in their 50's and 60's. They generally eat lunch in an office next to mine and when I decide to eat at my desk, I typically get an ear full.
Now most of the Bitties are very nice ladies and are named as follows:
Bittie Bittie - Because she is a Bittie.
Betty Bittie - she reminds me of Betty Rubble.
Chatty Bittie - the gossip of the office.
Queen Bittie - probably my favorite Bittie, and is also the big boss' assistant. And she seems to be the common thread that holds all the Bitties together.
Then there is also the Shuffler, named because of her walk. She isn't a Bittie, she is kind of like the department "special person." How she got a job here and retains a job here is beyond me. I have on several occasions walked by her office and noticed her sitting there staring at a blank computer screen literally twiddling her thumbs...
Well today's Bittie story involves Bittie Bittie, a lot of my Bittie stories will involve Bittie. While at a breakfast meeting for our entire department, she stated that our stomachs are, where she pointed is at what I would consider directly below my chest bone. Sorta in the middle of the girls. I was like, "no sir, that is not where my stomach is" but she insisted.I never really took a lot of science or anatomy type classes in college but I just knew my stomach didn't hang out between my girls. So I looked it up... http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/images/ency/fullsize/19223.jpg
Not exactly right, but kinda. Damn Bittie strikes again. Well I guess if the girls hang down low, I guess then your stomach would be between them. And for this reason my friends, is why you will see me wearing a sports bra until I'm 90.