This Explains A lot & My 100th Post!

Let's face it, or maybe I should face it rather...I'm a poser. This is something I like to call 'The Senior Picture Pose'

I have a bit of a secret. Something that not too many people know about me. I have a dark past, one I've been trying to hide for some time now, but I feel as though it is time for to air my dirty laundry, it's time to get it all out in the open.

I don't pay for counseling to attempt to deal with my issues, my good friend 2names and I do a pretty good job of analyzing each other. But I didn't need her help on this one. I figured it out all on my own. And I've just realized where some of my quirks come from. And I've decided not to be ashamed any longer.

So one of my dirty little secrets is ... that I love to watch 'America's Next Top Model.' Ya I know, I've tried to stop, and I just can't. Ok that's not true, I haven't really ever tried. I really can't explain why I like it. I say it's because I love to watch the little cat fights, but my favorite part of the show is watching the actual modeling. And now I know why...

This would be one of the first "modeling" pictures.

Notice the poster of Alyssa Milano behind me. I was a huge fan of "Who's the Boss" I also had Kirk Cameron, and evidently lots of cute kitties and puppies up on my wall.

Here we were going for more of an edgy look

I guess we really did have aspirations to making it big in the modeling world. Tyra would say I'm giving fierceness in this pose. Look at the expression in my eyes...We obviously showed early on our creativeness. Doesn't this picture also make you miss stonewashed jeans?

Yes we even did costume changes. These were the paisley pants, styled in the now infamous tight roll, too bad I didn't have the color coordinated matching socks. That would've been ultra cool.

I'd like to say that this modeling/posing behavior ended after adolescence ... but it didn't. This is me and my college roommates Niner and K-dawg, doing our best Charlie's Angels impression.

I'm afraid I can't be stopped. I just can't turn it off. I will always be simply .... a poser.

Sadie Sitting

This is Sadie Bear

We are watching her for The Dork and Shell. They are on their way to Nebraska for Memorial Day weekend. She's a pretty good girl.

She actually balances out the chaos in our household with our two other Bears, Steamboate Bear and Flaire Bear.

I think they just look like they are up to something. See Steamboate is saying "Oh snack ... or snap rather, I'm outta here...come on Flaire, lets ditch this place before they find out what we did." You know all slide like ... a little gansta, if you will.

I sometimes enjoy speaking for the boys. It's a fun little game we play...if only we knew what they were really thinking.
This is how she started off her visit. She's a cave dweller we decided.

They all seemed pretty happy in their respective spots. So we left them that way...doggies much better when they are laying down...See the perfect situation to use this phrase. "It is better to let a sleeping dog lie, lay?...whatever.

Padiddle

Padiddle is a funny word, and it does actually mean something. I didn’t make it up.

Growing up we always yelled “PADIDDLE” and hit the roof of the car when we saw a car with one headlight out. Also a variation of this was the “Beer Me” though I don’t think I should be condoning the drinking and driving of teenagers and college students. Though we all did it…sadly. But in both cases the winner was the person who spotted the headlight out and was the first to hit the roof. One would be awarded…well nothing but the respect of his/her peers for being so quick to the draw.

With the Beer Me version, basically you would be awarded a beer, while out road trippin’. Road Trippin in the country is kind of an inevitable, especially as a yong kid home from college with no place to go to down a few beers away from the parents. You’re at an age where you are too young to go to the bar and too old to hang out at Gas n Shop. I usually played it safe though if I was driving, I set my cruise at 30 mph. I guess I figured I couldn’t get too terribly hurt or really hurt anyone else if I was only going 30. Plus it allowed me to concentrate on steering instead of maintaining speed. Road trippin is also I how I finally learned how to pee outside without peeing on myself. As we would just pull over and pee outside on the dirt road, I first had to do the lean pee. Where you put one hand against the bumper or a tire and sort of propped yourself up, it gave me the proper angle as to which I wouldn’t pee on myself. Now I am proud to say that I have graduated to the full fledged regular squat, no more leaning for me, and I still get the pleasure of not peeing on myself, which is always a great thing. Camping taught me this, as sometimes when you are out in the woods it’s a little scary to be putting your hands on just any tree or stump; you never know what you’re putting it into.

Hopefully the Padiddle never dies, I will be sure to teach my kids this or at least my nieces and nephews if I never have kids. Though I think I will keep my road trippin stories on the down low, I don’t think I really want to pass that on, or encourage it, that probably wouldn’t be good.

A Beautiful Man

My husband is a beautiful man...

He is great with children...

He relates quite well with them I think.

Looks great in athletic wear...And who doesn't like a man in uniform...

Dogs love him...

Really love him...

Men love him...

And he loves them...

I love him.

Really what's not to love.

As he truly is a beautiful man...and lucky for me he's all mine.

James' Bathroom Creeps Me Out

I don't know what it is about the bathroom here, but I hate going to it sometimes.

I've already mentioned how I almost opened up a can of whip ass on a couple of dirty people who don't seem to know how to wash thier hands. And then there was the lady that looks like Mama from Momma's Family who just happened to have her potty urges timed out to be identical with mine...creepy.

And then today. There was a woman talking to herself in the bathroom. I stuck around long enough to find out if she was on the phone...she wasn't. She was talking to herself.

Now I'm not one to say anything bad about people talking to themselves, I talk to myself all the time. I carry on complete conversations with myself, I'll answer myself when I ask a question, I even move my lips and incorperate facial expressions. But I don't do it when I know someone can hear me or see me moving my lips. And if they catch me doing it I quickly scamper away.

No this woman seemed to be oblivious to the fact that she was sitting on the john carrying on a converstion with the voices in her head and that there were people within earshot. I wish I could've understood her better, wonder if her conversations are more interesting then the ones I have...probably not. I wonder if she talks to herself in Klingon, or some other vague language so it can't be decifered easily.

Sorry I'm bored....

Earth Day Trees

This is what my trees looked like when I first got them on Earth Day...they were sticks, literally. But I planted them in some pots and gave them some love, it also helped that its been raining like a bunch of banchies here lately, but they started to actually look like they were alive.

And now they look like this....That's Steamboate he's trying to help...he's not much help.


See there he is again "trying to help."

I'm thinking that some day I will have some big beautiful shade trees in my yard, so that I don't melt away on those hot Texas summer days. Plus I live way to close to my neighbors and I don't really want to be able to see you having supper.
And yes I know I need to mow my weeds...did you not listen when I said it has been raining a lot?

Broken

This is how I like so sit whilst working....

I'm a little perturbed...I broke my chair.

It was broken since I got it, but I loved the broken bits. The part you sit on actually moved in and out, so that it actually flowed with my butt when I slouched down in my chair, which is how I like to sit. I'll probably develop back problems some day, but until then I shall slouch, its comfy.

I just like this little guy, he kinda looks like he might be eating popcorn.

I love popcorn.

But it was at lunch time when I broke it, I guess that banana I had just sort of tipped me over its breaking point, the chair remained in permanent slouch position. Which normally I wouldn't mind, but it kind of annoying when you do actually want to sit properly. Plus I was kinda feelig like an I was too big, you know breaking my chair and all, and it was making me feel self-conscience.

I switched it out and this new chair, well its not quite the same. It'll do, but I do miss the seat moving with me when I slouch. Maybe I can break this one so it will do it as well.

Flipping or Flicking

My husband is insistent that you flick people off, when giving them the bird. I don't know where he got this but it really needs to stop.
I think he made it up, well obviously he made it up, probably what happened is he accidently said flick one time and instead of correcting himself decided that he would from then until the end of all eternity say flick instead of flip.
I can't even describe how annoying this can be after so many years. Luckily, we don't get into too many conversations about flipping or flicking, or we might be divorced that’s how excruciatingly annoying it is to me. Usually it comes up when we are in the car, when some dumbass is driving like...well...a dumbass, they deserve the finger. And I’ll say something innocent like “Did you just flip them off?” And he’ll say “No, I flicked them off.”
I’m like, you flick your boogers, and you flip people off. You know flip them the bird? Your hand is down, you extend the middle finger, turning hand up and facing outwards, that is the motion of a flip. Your hand goes from down to up, a flip.
You flick when you want to get something off of your thumb or your flick a bug off of your shirt. That is flicking…
These are not the same motions at all and frankly his is just wrong. I will make him see the light.
I recently got to flip my brother off actually. We have such a loving relationship. Well that is actually how we show our love for each other, calling each other names and flipping each other off when we see one another.
I was recently on my way home the other day when I pulled up behind him. (Let me first preface this by saying that it is highly unusual for me to just “run” into someone I know around here. But we do live in the same town, so its not too terribly unusual, I’ve ran into him twice now since I moved to Wylie in 2007)
So I pull up behind him at a left hand turning lane and we are waiting for the light. I knew it was him because he is the only person in town, or probably the whole metro-plex with Nebraska Cornhusker stickers covering up the Ford symbols on his truck. (I would cover up the Ford symbols as well, a freaking disgrace driving around a Ford, but I digress, I tend to do that a lot, digress that is, so anyway….) There was a woman behind me so I didn’t want her to think I was flipping her off, so I was trying to lean over and put the finger in front of my face so he would both see me and my finger if he looked into his rearview mirror. But he didn’t, I’m just sitting there doing the middle finger salute in my car with a cheesy grin on my face.
So finally I honked to get his attention, which I generally don’t like to honk in rush hour traffic as I don’t want to get shot, but I did just a little one.
And I’m sure he was thinking “WTF? Why the hell is someone honking at me?” Then finally he looked in his rearview and saw me, his darling lil sis. He appropriately returned the proper formalities as he adjusted the phone he was chatting on, I guess he’s a right hand flipper only. Then we went on our merry ways.

John Wayne

McLintock. 

It might just be one of my favorite John Wayne movies, that and Cowboys. I think Cowboys is one of the only movies the Duke died in. 

McLintock though, how do I describe it? He spanks his fiery and quite spirited red headed wife, and he condones the spanking of his daughter by one of his hired hands, who happens to be smitten with her, all because she kissed a man before they were even engaged. What a scank. 

George Washington McLintock chases his wife though town after she accused him of coming home one night with lipstick on his cheek, all an innocent misunderstanding mind you, and while he chases her she goes through various stages of disrobing. She loses her dress, then her slip thingy and she then seems oblivious that she is running through town during the Fourth of July Celebration in nothing but her skibbies. Though we are talking circa 1800's skibbies, so not exactly Victoria Secret negligee. 

There are so many faux pas in this movie, between the conflicts with the unarmed Indians, and the way McLintock seems to think its ok to turn the women in his life over his knee, almost makes your mouth drop, but the movie was made in 1963 so I guess, being politically correct wasn't as much of an issue.

Once in college Niner, Amber, Meg and I loaded up in my car at around midnight on the day before Thanksgiving from Wayne, Nebr. and set off for Canada. We made it to Des Moines, Iowa. Which was directly 8 hours west of where we started, ya I know we went the wrong direction. We just felt like going on a road trip and let the wind take us where it may, and Des Moines was evidently the way.

I'm glad we did, hopped up on No Doz we hit town, in what we thought at the time as the bad side of town, I think we saw a few homeless people or something and decided we were too impressionable to get out of the car, so we decided to turn back, but not before stopping at the Duke's birthplace. It was just a lil white house, in a town where if you blinked you'd miss it, just outside of Des Moines. The place was closed but, I read the plaque outside and got my picture taken. I walked where the Duke walked. That alone was worth the trip.

I've got a party to go to now and will probably partake in the consumption of alcoholic beverages. Maybe stay up kinda late, and tomorrow I may not be the most chipper bird, in which case I might be able to use the words of the Duke to whoever might try to talk to me in the morning...."Don't say it's a fine morning or I'll shoot ya!" 

All Done

Yes. I'm finished I have completed the transfer of all my posts over to this blog. Only took me 2 days not too bad. 

So I'm pretty excited about the new setup. I do kinda like it if I do say so myself. I will post a link to the old blog for a while but I won't be posting there anymore as I'm a blogspot blogger now.